SOMETHING TO TELL THE PEOPLE OF EDMONTON?



Birthday Party Request

My son was invited to a classmate’s birthday party and on the invitation it said “Only purchase LEGO sets that are $25.00 or more. Any other items will be dropped off to Goodwill, as it was not asked for on the invitation.

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I was shocked by this request or demand (whatever the correct term is and not to offend anyone).

My son did not go, as he said “I want to get my friend a water gun not LEGO.” As a result we politely declined the invitation. Some nerve people have.


SOMETHING TO TELL THE PEOPLE OF EDMONTON?

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176 thoughts on “Birthday Party Request

    1. Yep. Since it’s “all going to Goodwill” anyways, just cut out the middleman and give one of those “A DONATION HAS BEEN MADE IN YOUR NAME TO…” cards lol.

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  1. My grand son had his 6th birhday and he didn’t want a gift. He said please donations to the food bank, and all brought food was great of him to do that. For a 6 year old.

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    1. We went to a birthday party that said the same thing on the invitation. “Bring items for the food bank” there was lost of food bank bags, it was great to see. Of course the child got gifts from immediate family and we picked up a couple things from the dollar store too.

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  2. Wow. Good for you for not going. I have enough trouble getting kids to come to my daughter’s mid-summer birthday party I hate when parents do this. They don’t realize how lucky they are.

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    1. I feel for your girl. My birthday is July 30 and my mom had to round up random kids in the neighbourhood when I was young so that I would have more guest at my parties than my brother and I.

      But as as adult mid summer birthdays are the best! Lots of adventures to be had.

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    2. I totally understand, Natasha. My and my daughter’s birthdays are 5 days apart (mine is July 27 and hers is Aug 1) so I know exactly what she’s gonna go through unfortunately :/.

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    3. My nieces bday is July 23rd so my bro started doing her “with friends” birthday party mid-june so she can actually have kids attend. Seh loves it. My niece & nephew never really wants gifts either so the invite asks for gift cards to whatever charity they chose that year. Being he’s widowed, I think he’s got this birthday thing figured out pretty good. Hehe

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  3. Lol that is an outrageous request. To say whatever is not Lego will be donated to Goodwill is insulting and I definitely wouldn’t be sending my child to a birthday party like that. Geez some peoples kids

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  4. I had a specific list of what toys family members could buy my children when they were little as at some point the toys do get out of control. But when it came to friends coming to parties it was whatever. We didn’t even care if they brought a gift or not as along as they came to hang out. I would never put that on a party invitation.

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  5. Wow and here I am telling people no presents necessary as my kid doesn’t really care about gifts. It’s to be surrounded by other kids his age to laugh, play, eat cake and enjoy a moment of celebration.

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    1. That’s exactly what I’ve been doing. “No gifts necessary” on the invites. Some people get gift cards to be polite, but my daughter genuinely doesn’t care for gifts, she just wants to have fun with kids.

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  6. I would have done the same and kept my kids from going. I would not punish the Birthday child however by breaking contact as some have mentioned. If my child was a good and real friend to this child, I’d be upfront about why they could not attend and let my child give the birthday kid a small gift at school anyway. It takes a village as they say. If no one goes and the kid never knows why- mom and dad get to create a future jerk who thinks no one like him/her. If people are upfront with the Birthday child, the child will realize that demanding the gift particulars is inappropriate. It would get back to his/her parents and they would realize they are just hurting their kid.

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  7. What the hell … first you demand a certain gift … then you put a price to that gift and worst of all you flat out say anything else will be given to goodwill … my kid would never go to that party … shame on the parents … i bet he would have gotten some awesome gifts … wow some people

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  8. Okay here’s what you should do. Buy a Lego set that costs $25. Empty the Legos out of it and give it them to your son. Then take a photo of yourself holding up your middle finger and smiling. Place the photo inside of the box, wrap it, and give it to the spoiled little arsehole for his birthday.

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    1. Even $20.00 would be high for some families~ I like the exchange idea best – teaches sharing – it might be more or less than $20 but its not affecting the actual amount of money having to put out – some gifts the child may not even play with and would be practically new..

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  9. Some parents holy wow my son recently went to a party at the humane society and they asked if instead of gifts that parents made a donation of any amount to EHS now we’re doing it next year, I think parents should make a child learn to appreciate things and be selfless

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    1. Exactly! Show up, eat the cake, play the games and then when the mom asks where the gifts are, show a picture of the donation of new toys. You’re following her request, and still get cake. Win win.

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  10. Poor birthday kid. He is going to grow up with nobody liking him. If you see him often you should let him know that it’s not polite to ask for gifts. You’d be doing him a favour. His mother is NOT a good mother. I wonder if it would be OK for the mother to say he wanted to save up for the Lego set so instead of any gifts, a cash donation would be nice.

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  11. I give out a list of different items and where to buy items, but in no way expect anyone to follow the list for my daughter (for family, grandparents/aunts/uncles). She is 3 right now, so friends are very few and far between, but would never ask for a specific item from them.

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    1. Not really, as I always put that this are just ideas and the family can get what they think our daughter would like. Normal it is just the paternal grandfather as he is rarely around. And never more then $20.00.

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  12. My goodness. The past weekend was my daughter’s party. We specifically wrote on the invitation : gifts not mandatory. Some didn’t bring a gift and my daughter didn’t notice. What she did notice was all the people who came to her party to have fun with her. I can’t imagine what type of child these parents are raising.

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  13. I feel bad for the birthday kid, I doubt he would care what the set cost if all he truly wanted was more lego. I hope kids went and just didn’t bring any presents with them. Those parents should be very very ashamed of themselves.

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  14. I’m playing devils advocate maybe the gifts were intended to be passed on to kids in a hospital or for Santa’s anonymous or a toy ride… I wouldn’t let someone tell me what to gift. My children s friendship of showing up and partying with the birthday child would be somehow more meaningful than anything material

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  15. At my son’s birthday, we didn’t want any gift over $10 at his party so that no one felt that that presents were the reason we were having a party. I was just so happy that so many kids showed up and enjoyed themselves.

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    1. Do you have kids? I do – and I would NEVER allow my child to think that sort of behaviour or thinking is acceptable. As a single mom I can’t afford 25$ for every single birthday party my kid attends.
      Even if the kid requested it – it’s the parents job to shut it down, not put it into action!

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  16. For my sons birthday this year I’m asking for second hand gifts to reduce our carbon footprint. I wouldn’t have gone to that party, or bought a few non $25 LEGO sets and considered them donations to good will.

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    1. I read the article you posted on your page but then read your plan to ask for second hand gifts. To grab something from your own child’s toy collection that doesn’t get played with. I absolutely love your idea!!!

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  17. I polite thing to do would be to kindly say gifts are not required, however, if you feel the need please contribute $5 so that he could purchase the Lego set he is saving up for. We went to a party and the invite said something about contributing to a larger purchase at a toy store. I was not offended by this and thought the $5 requested was too little so we bought a few other items to accompany the $5.

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  18. Holy Jesus! I tell people not to bring anything. My kids have tonnes. I had friends angry at me that I was too busy to make their daughters thirds birthday. 1.5 months later, the dad and daughter came to my daughter’s birthday party, made sure I knew they expected a present and then told his daughter “oh auntie didn’t love you enough to come to your birthday party”. I was done! We don’t speak anymore. It might sound drastic but I don’t need drama over a bday party. Parents get dumb around them… and I LOVE birthdays!

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  19. WOW! Some nerve is right! Good for you standing your ground and teaching your son right from wrong along the way. Ps Better if he buys himself a present there is only so much money anyway.

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  20. Next time u invite that chikd put that u want something expensive for your son’s bday. (Only do it to their invitation however). See if mom declines or accepts. Who knows maybe she’ll say something to u about the request.

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  21. I would have declined the invitation and told the parent why. If more people declined the party for the same reason but didn’t explain their reasoning then the parent won’t know why few people showed to the party. Reason would be “I’m not sure buying only the requested gift is sending the right message to your child but it definitely isn’t sending the right one to my child. As a result I can’t participate in this event because I feel it sends a wrong message about gift giving and receiving.” The kid probably doesn’t really care it’s the parent who don’t want to spend the money on legos.

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  22. This breaks my heart. What are they teaching this child?? Poor thing probably doesn’t even know any better at this point.

    Now because of what they are doing he is missing out as I assume many normal people would be offended by that and not attend or allow their child to even associate with this kid.

    They certainly are not doing him any favours present or future.

    (Referring to the Birthday kid and the “values” the parents are teaching)

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  23. I read somewhere that because a child didn’t go to a birthday party they were invited to got a bill in the mail for the dinner and cost of gift that wasn’t sent. I just saw red when I saw that post. Just how greedy can people get.

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  24. And that’s why kids are fucked!!! Now a days what happend to when u can get the devils spawn anything. Who the fuck writes on the invitation only this nothing else?? That kid is going to grow up to be a pompous little bitch. I’m honestly scared to grow old if this is what’s going to be taken care of and running the country

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  25. I try not to judge the kid when it’s the parent’s with this problem. My son recently went to a party and he asked the bday boy what he would like. He said Lego with more than 500 pieces. I looked for sets in the $20-$25 price range and there was definitely nothing. He wasn’t demanding Lego though. It was just one of the suggestions that first came to his mind. We bought him a Nerf water gun and apparently he loved it.

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  26. As ridiculous and outrageous as that demand is, of all the places to donate to, don’t pick Goodwill who will sell it possibly to someone who will then sell it on kijiji for more. If you’re going to donate brand new toys, pick Little Warriors, The Zebra Centre, Women’s Shelters, Santa’s Anonymous, Inner City School etc.

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  27. I don’t judge the children either but unfortunately no matter how sweet the kid is eventually the influence of the parent’s behavior shapes them into who they are. My kids hang out with the child and then they start acting the same way.

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  28. Wow. And here when I made my daughter’s invites all I asked for
    is any known allergies
    And to bring swimsuit/change of clothes and a water gun as we will be having a water balloon fight etc…

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  29. Birthday parties are a celebration of my kid making it another year. They have enough that presents are never necessary and I make that clear to them and those invited. My kids are told often be thankful for what you have and receive. I would decline this invite as you should be grateful for what you receive even if it is not what you want.

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  30. This is a tough one for me. I did something similar as the party parent this past year, but I think I did it the right way. We were in the process of moving out of town and my child wanted to have a going away/early birthday party at Galaxyland. Because of the move, we were financially strapped, but I didn’t want her to miss out on a party with her friends. We came up with a plan to be able to make it work. The invitation read “In leiu of gifts, we are asking that you pay the $10 entry fee so that my child can celebrate her party with all of her closest friends”. I was very nervous and felt guilty about this request. I thought that families would be offended. As it turned out, it was a huge success, all but one family was able to make it, and many of the children brought her a gift as well. It was a wonderful day for her and the other children.

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    1. That’s not at all similar. Yours was a reasonable request and it was about making it simple and fun for your child. Parents make requests all the time.
      This parent however, was demanding $25plus lego sets and then adding if it was not as requested, the toys would go to Goodwill. That’s just rude.

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  31. I wouldn’t have gone but I would have dropped off a card so the child didn’t feel badly. It’s not his fault his parents are teaching him to be elitist.

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  32. I wouldn’t have allowed my child to go either. Last year we asked for donations for the spca and later delivered it all with a group photo of everyone who attended the party. My son was so proud of himself.

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  33. Greedy and unacceptable to raise your children this way! My children are thankful for all, even underwear, even just your appearance!!! My child wouldn’t go or I would buy a toy specifically to be sent to goodwill where someone appreciates it more!

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  34. We have had 2 lego parties in a row (2 years) both times we have stated that gifts aren’t necessary however if they wish to give a gift our son is building his Lego collection and he would be very appreciative:)

    I love when there is a theme or gift ideas it helps me shop for other peoples kids 🙂

    The way the OP invitation is though, it would probably turn me off. However if it was someone i knew really well and it was part of their sense of humor and they were also a great gift giver then i would reconsider.

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  35. wow! the nerve of some parents lol … my son had a toonie party . if they wanted to being a gift we asked for 2 toonies – one for charity of my son’s choice and the other for my son to pool together to but something… but only if they wanted. Some people are so entitled!

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