SOMETHING TO TELL THE PEOPLE OF EDMONTON?



Need help fixing my relationship

I need help fixing my relationship i messed up extremely bad. Now my wife cant trust me at all for what i did to her.

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Does anyone know how i can make things better between me an her?

I love her with all my heart and i dont want to see her leave!

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SOMETHING TO TELL THE PEOPLE OF EDMONTON?

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81 thoughts on “Need help fixing my relationship

  1. It really depends what you did to her to be honest. If you physically and mentally abused her then seeking help, attending hanging ways, meds, psychologist would show her you are changing. If there was any unfaithfulness then perhaps you can see a marriage counselor. It really depends what you did but perhaps showing her steps you are taking to fix it instead of just talking about it will help. Good luck.

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  2. You should let her express to you in all the emotions she has how what you did hurt her…. LISTEN, empathize, put yourself in her shoes. How would you feel. Then verbalized back to her what you heard. Stand up be a man and admit your wrong Express how sorry you are for what you did, with NO excuses. Asking her what she needs you to do and do it and continue to do. Perhaps counselling. Maybe you have some issues you yourself need to work on and that is causing relationship troubles. Hope things work out for you.

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  3. It bothers me how people fuck up and then say how much they love their significant other. If you truly love someone you don’t fuck up that bad that she would want to walk away in the first place. People make mistakes sure, but if it was infidelity the only true mistake would be her staying with you. If it was lies about money or something like that, you disrespected your relationship and most likely don’t deserve her anyways. Colour me bitter, but you reap what you sow.

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  4. You should be asking her what she needs you to do and what she need from you. And then you do it…without being defensive, without being annoyed, without turning it into something about you. And then you do it until…she trusts you again, she forgives you, and she can look at you without hating you. And sometimes, even then, she can’t get over what you’ve done, but you need to put in the effort until she decides.

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  5. From a man’s pov, if you loved her you wouldn’t have hurt her in the first place. If you broke her trust that’s a hard thing to repair and maybe it’s best you move on because what’s done is done and there will never be full trust again

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    1. trust in a relationship is like a string between two people once its broken itll never be the same you can tie the string back together but it ll never be the way it was.

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    1. Not in all cases. I messed up when Andrew and I first got together yes I fucked up!!! But never ever again. Now we have been together 8 years and still truly, madly, deeply in love.

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    2. That sux that you had to go threw that, but look at your out come now my girl!! You have a wonderful guy and a beautiful daughter. We are all different it doesn’t keep happening, in all cases. Now your engaged and soon to be happily married.

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    3. Yeah one bad relationship led me to the most amazing relationship I ever had and have 2 beautiful daughters! Some people can change some can’t
      But to rebuild trust takes a long time!

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  6. Don’t f up again, do your daily duties and time. Treat her her as how she needs to be. Like how you see her, how she sees herself. Don’t f up again!!!
    Show how you learnt, you changed, it’s all in time things can get better.
    If not . Move on and learn.

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  7. Trust takes time to mend once it’s broken. Since you didn’t divulge how you messed up, it’s difficult to try and figure out how to fix it from outside help. If you cheated, good luck on that, if it was something else, take baby steps. Sit her down and try and explain why you messed up, and how you will get her trust back in time. It all depends if she’s open to that. She did marry you, so maybe there’s hope. Hope that helps some

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  8. In my opinion, ask her what she needs to make it work. Talking to her will be the only way. And she may need time, so you have to respect that but if it’s meant to be, whatever happens is all worth it.
    A lesson is a lesson for a reason.. as long as you learn and don’t repeat it.

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  9. Almost everything is forgivable, except spousal abuse. But you probably will be making it up to her for the rest of your life together, regardless.

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  10. Please tell me what “loving her with all your heart ” means to you if you hurt her that badly. I always thought love was something you don’t switch off and on depending on your whims.

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    1. It depends what the tough times are. OP is vague about what happened. Couples hit rough patches, that happens. But cheating? If that’s the case OP won’t find sympathy here. Cheating isn’t a typical rough patch and it’s crap to try and normalize it. Couples should work on the the relationship before it gets to that point, not after. For a lot of people cheating is their tipping point and the relationship is no longer salvageable.

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  11. You will need to answer any questions she has with absolute truth. You will need to take it every time she lets you have it for what you did. You need to own up…with no excuses or trying to place the blame on her because she didn’t do, be or want what you do or did. You will need to do WHATEVER she needs from you for as long as she needs until the trust is rebuilt. If you need to let go of friends because they are bad influences, then you will need to do that. If she needs to check up on you to ensure you are where you said you would be, then you need to allow that. If she needs to talk to you until 4 am about her feelings regarding what you did and you have to work at 6 am, then I guess you will have to go without sleep. If she needs you to open up and talk about your feelings, you will need to do that. If you can do that and never get defensive or impatient with how long it takes, then you might be able to repair things. I think the true measure of your love for her will be your willingness to do what needs to be done. It’s easy to say you love someone with all your heart, its a lot harder to prove it by doing things that are uncomfortable. If you can’t do what she needs, then let her go.

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  12. It’s all about your actions now my friend! If you have lost trust and need to get it back, you need to up your behaviour and prove that you are trustworthy – it will take a long time but if you stick to it, you can work to earn the trust back. words will not be enough.

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  13. Sometimes, often actually when you get to this point you are beyond the point of fixing. I am going to assume a few things, but if you broke her trust the way you suggest, then you are going to have to let her lead, spend lots of time waiting for her to come around if ever. She may never come back around. If you take your side of the relationship to out of bounds areas you may never be able to fix. Some have come back from shattered trust, but that is rare.

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  14. Ppl hve tendancy too hold on to hurt. Its almost like no matter wht you can do to try mend it. Years later its still going to be something tht will be brought up. Love is the strongest bt most fragile feeling evr. Excuses. Excuses. We were fighting. I ws so drunk. She threw herself. Ppl can feel if they ar drifting. Most important thing is communication. Relationships ar i think most important fire to nevr let go out. Has to be kept. Its work. Bt the best most fun kind. Bt if someone cheats. The fire wont evr be the same. Some ppl ar more forgiving nd. Will take fault. Guess it comes down to the seriousness of the love created. Breaks my heart see some men bend ovr backwards to pamper their princess. Nd the princess jst almost expects it. If your a pamperd princess then you should cater your prince. Its defeniaty a 2 way street. You dont hve to do the most extravagant things to show appreciation for someone. Like i said communication is the most important key. Sometimes. Ppl ar jst ovr workd nd tired. So if they dont feel like talking. Its caus they dont knw whts bothering them. Women allot the time pick at problems. They see hes quiet. Or tired. Bt mayb he jst needs some time to think. Being wuiet doenst mean the end of a relationship. Bt picking nd pestering could. Most likely will start a fight. The most common one. She thinks your hiding sonething. When really. Your jst resting. How can someone tell you whts wrong if they dont knw.

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    1. Tht fight is the one tht usually pushes ppl apart. Whts wrong. Whts wrong. Shes scared shes losing him. He thinks shes a bitch. Who wont let him breath. He starts thinking all the things he has done to try nd make her happy. Nd he jst doesnt knw. Whts on his mind. Tht is usually linked to sleep. Or supression. Something little tht he jst didnt deal with could be something at work a little stress tht he said il do tht later. Then forgot. Nd is jst trying remeber. Relaxing is important. Guys need take time for them selves too.

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